Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Stuck?

I'm wondering if it has been too cold lately for fermentation to continue.  No bubbling in the fermentation locks has been noticeable for the past couple of days.  We have the heat set at 65 degrees overnight and the temperature hasn't gotten too much warmer during the daytime in our house.  It could be that the yeast has gone dormant because it is too cold--so fermentation is stuck.  It is likely to get hotter so I'm just going to wait a while and see if that gets the yeast going again.  It is also possible that most of the fermentation was complete shortly after I racked the wine to the secondary containers and so further change isn't easily apparent.  So, wait a while...test out the situation for a bit, observing if there is subtle change or not, or if there is anything that is required of me.

Sometimes in spiritual life it can feel like we are in a stuck place.  Nothing seems to be happening.  No apparent growth or change or even particular interests are evident.  Occasionally we do get stuck.  I may be resisting change.  Sometimes I just want to be in a "holding pattern" and feel the comfort of that which is known and familiar, including my present understanding of God and my relationship to God.  Sometimes we might be unconsciously resisting spiritual movement--I might feel that there is something in me that is holding back but I don't know what that is.  Or maybe I feel a little numb about my relationships, including that core Being, or bored, or disconnected.  Maybe there is something I fear I am being invited into so I unconsciously defend myself.   Having a trusted spiritual friend or group to honestly share those times with can help us move through the experiences of stuckness. 

And sometimes what feels like stuckness isn't really what is going on deep within.  Sometimes God is working at a dark level below our conscious awareness.  Perhaps in our prayer we can give God permission to do that deep work--that slow, subtle healing and transforming work in those places beyond our awareness.  Maybe we will only see the product, the fruit, of that work later on in our life; or have it reflected back to us by others who can see the evidence of that interior work of grace more clearly than we are capable of seeing in ourselves.

Have you had times of feeling spiritually stuck?  What did you discover through those experiences?

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